Something had to happen to make me blog again, right?
Well, ta-da! It did.
What is it? I am at TwiCon in Dallas. If you don't know why TwiCon is, it's the first ever Twilight Conference. If you don't know what Twilight is, your address might include "Under" and "Rock."
If you know me (and if you don't, I guess you are about to find out), you know I have sort of a love/hate relationship with Stephenie Meyer's Twilight Saga.
I had no idea what Twilight was until the film came out. At that point, my cousin asked me if I wanted to see the movie. It was MANIC. I am a vampire aficionado, so I was into the movie, even if they almost lost me when vampire Edward started sparkling in the sun instead of exploding. That aside, I was intrigued, so I bought the first book.
I couldn't put it down, and then proceeded to devour the remaining three books.
OK, so I understand that you might be wondering where the hatred part comes in, and the truth is that it's hard to explain. Bear with me as I bare my soul.
There are many issues when it comes to the books. One of them is that the writing is quite poor. If I had picked up the book years ago, before watching the movie and knowing what I was in for, I might have not continued past the first few pages. As someone who taught writing I was a tad bit embarrassed for the author, whose style was unrefined and who often came across as a histrionic schoolgirl (thanks Allie for finding the right way to put it) in the throes of her first crush. Meyer gets better at the craft as she progresses from book to book, but she never achieves the level of writing that one might expect from a best-selling author. Oh, wait...isn't Tori Spelling also a best-selling author? What was I thinking? I am not alone in thinking she is not particularly good. Author Stephen King has been quoted as saying, "Stephenie Meyer can't write worth a darn. She's not very good." Then again, some might say that about King, but I having read both, I'd say he is right, and he has the chops to make the criticism.
Then, my question to myself was, "Why can you not put the book down if she is so horrid?" I have yet to be able to answer that. I guess the story and the characters are interesting, which is a separate issue from the quality of the book. It is a mystery to me, and as someone who seeks to understand life, this discrepancy bothers me. A lot.
The quality of the writing is not the only thing that creeps me out. As a woman, and as someone who considers herself a feminist in many ways, these books disgust me. It's too much to get into in one post, and I am writing on it, but let's just say that Bella, the main character is not the most progressive or desirable role model for young girls. Twilight easily puts the feminist movement back a few good years. Not to mention both the alarming and unrealistic depiction of what love is supposed to feel like and look like. It is enough to make me want to scream. The positive thing is that some of us can use the book in order to start a dialogue about this.
Another area that concerns me is the religious undertones of the novel. Not because I am an atheist, but because they are sneaky and send the wrong message to those who read it without even knowing what they are consuming. I will leave that one alone for now, but, trust me, it's not pretty.
Last but not least, at least for now, I find it infuriating that Meyer gingerly did away with much of the vampire lore and admits to having done no research on vampires. As a professor, I'd like to give her an F for effort. As a vampire lover, I'd like to rewrite a lot of her stupid ideas.
Can you see me stewing as I write?
My father asked a very good question as he drove me to the airport to make my way to TwiCon. He said, "If you go to the conventions and speak about how the books are poor quality, get all the vampire stuff wrong, and have the wrong messages, why do you like them?" ARGH! I DON'T KNOW!
There is a lot to love. The characters can be a lot of fun, the adventures they have are exciting, and there is even a vampire mafia. Some of the stuff is incredibly cool and tons of fun, which I guess is what wins over my brain on most days. I've grown attached to the people, the places, and even some of the witty lines. I think she had a great cocktail going, especially the love story that seems so perfect to us who deal with the harsh realities of mortal romance. It can be intoxicating to just let that take you away.
See? Love/Hate/Love.
I feel a bit bipolar.
Anyway, that is a long intro to why I am blogging.
I have come to a place where I can allow both sides to live in harmony. The way that I look at it, Twilight is McTwilight, my fast food of sorts. It's not good; it's not good for me; but I still crave it at times. As long as I am doing my part as a professor to educate the youth, and I am also feeding my brain with high brow stuff, I don't think reading Twilight will be put me in the danger zone for stupidity.
Now, however, there is an added area that makes me feel ill about this whole thing: the fandom. Again, hard to explain. It's almost like you want to talk to other who like something you like, and who get why you like it. In that sense, meeting like-minded people can be awesome. However, I hate the word fan because of its etymology. It comes from fanatic, even if people might have disambiguated the meaning and now it just means someone who loves something with fervor.
Well, what I have been living here at TwiCon is fanatism to the max. It is nuts. People are lining up to breathe the same air as celebrities. People who might usually be intelligent have their brains instantly liquified by the sheer presence of someone whose face is on a film. People who might have a personality become nothing but carbon copies of others and act like a mob. It scares me half to death.
I have eschewed all celebrity-related activities while here. I came to deliver a paper and chair a panel, both educational endeavors, and I was hoping this would be as much fun as going to Forks for Summer School in Forks was. How deluded was I? Forks felt organic, real. We discussed the books, visited the places we love from the books, and geeked out watching the movie and yelling at Kristen Stewart to stop blinking every two seconds.
Here, we have been treated like kindergartners, herded like cattle, and it all feels like a consumption fest, not to be extremely Marxist about it.
I am exhausted and disgusted, but it has been an experience as a cultural phenomenon.
Would I do it again? There is a TwiCon coming up in Toronto, I believe. If no one from TwiCon reads this and gets upset at me, I might do it again, knowing what to expect and hoping that they have learned from this experience what should not be done.
This is a bit ranty and meandering, I know. I apologize. If anything, it is a testament to how I am feeling.
Will I blog again? Maybe. I am leaving it open.
Love you guys.
Natalia
